I remember looking into the mirror as my head dipped, the rolled dollar bill to my nostril, thinking.......What the hell are you doing?! You're 40, you have 2 kids in elementary school, you go to church every Sunday, you're a freakin' *doctor's* WIFE! What would the PTO have to say? Your son just won the DARE contest. How can you live two such opposing lives?
And yet my head continued to dip and meet its mark - a fine line of white powder on the sink's edge. Following the trail from one side to the other and tipping my head back, I sniffed in deeply, feeling that telltale bitter dryness at the back of my throat. Almost instantly, I could feel the relief of a subtle clarity of rightness with the world, and said to myself. Yes. This was why. Knock back the guilt. No one will know.
And I can be all ....and anything.....to everyone.
No comments:
Post a Comment